I Am A Star
I feel as though I have been a student of life for as long as I can remember, but now I call it walking on a spiritual path. I am always curious why things happen, and try to learn from obstacles when they arise so I won’t have to go through the same unpleasant experience again. A few years ago, in an effort to deepen in my spirituality, I went to the University of Santa Monica and received my Masters in Spiritual Psychology. I lead workshops, online series, and write articles to share my learnings.
Meditation is something that is so beneficial for my well-being that I strive to do it daily for 20 minutes. I can really tell when I haven’t done it for a while because I feel out of whack, off center, and can get pretty short tempered with my kids. Always open to new experiences, I jumped at the chance to try a new meditation studio that I heard about.
I chose the crystal healing guided meditation class because it was right after my exercise class and in the same neighborhood. I could work out my body then my mind. Perfect! When I got there I saw a studio that was contemporary, new, and hip. The meditation room was dimly lit in a blue hue and had these chairs on the floor that you can bend forward and then lay all the way back, kind of like a bed. The softest blankets were folded over the top of each chair. A diffuser was releasing a calm and clean scent. I laid the chair back, crawled on, then put the soft blanket over me. I set the intention to experience everything available to me in this meditation and asked my ego to take a back seat, so I could be completely present.
A soulfully beautiful gal welcomed us and began leading the session. She spoke a little bit about something she learned from her life and then started with some breathing exercises to get us relaxed. She asked us to imagine a golden cord connecting down from our root chakra, through the floor, through the earth, with its rock and the water, down, down, down, all the way to the center of the earth. She spoke of how grounded and connected we are on the planet. Then she asked us to imagine a bright white loving light coming up from the root chakra through our body, up to and out of the top of our head or crown chakra, and the light continues into the sky, through the clouds, through the atmosphere, and stratosphere into the galaxy and beyond. I completely relaxed and allowed my body to float up and do exactly what she was saying (which I can only partially remember). Then all of the sudden, I stopped hearing her words and was only experiencing. You know how in movies they have a spacecraft and it shoots to another galaxy with the speed of light? It’s there one second then it blasts and boom it’s gone? That is what happened to me. I went into another galaxy and then shot again at light speed to yet another. When I arrived in the third galaxy, I was a star. I was laying down flat like I was laying on my back and I was looking at the millions of stars around me. It was out of this world; so peaceful and beautiful. The peace was such an awe-inspiring peace, that I can’t even find the words that come close to describing it. I was home.
As I laid there about 350 stars moved closer and made a semi-circle around me. Light beams were shooting out of the 5 points of my star. Then all of a sudden, two stars shot over and stopped catty-corner from me. Light beams were shooting out of their star points as well. On each side, their light beams connected with mine making a triangle at the bottom of my star with our connecting beams. When I looked at the two stars that had joined me, I recognized them immediately as my mother and father. I recognized them just like I did when we were on the planet, but I felt more connected and comfortable in this moment with them than I did the entire time they were here. We were stars, but I recognized them immediately. It was totally peaceful and normal. By normal I mean it wasn’t weird or scary. I wasn’t confused. I felt, “Awwww. We are here, back together. We are home.” Again, I have to say the peace and beauty I experienced cannot be described with any words. It was beyond.
I was in that moment of love, peace and awe when I heard the meditation instructor’s voice again. She said, “It’s time to come back into your body. Come back through the stars, into the galaxy, through our stratosphere, our atmosphere, come back through the clouds, down through the sky, through the roof, bring the light back down to your crown chakra, down your spine and connecting to your root chakra. You are back in your body. Continue to breathe slowly and when you are ready, you can gently blink open your eyes.” I listened and did as she said. I was back in my body and the session was over. I took my deep breaths and blinked opened my eyes. She thanked us and walked out of the room. As ladies were chatting about Pilates and what they were having for lunch, I was freaking out, looking all around the room trying to make eye contact with someone. I was thinking, “What in the hell just happened? Excuse me ladies…hello? Is anyone else freaking out here? Was anyone else just a star?”
I couldn’t believe what happened. I was blown away and feeling extremely emotional. I was tripping out. I felt like I experienced where I really am residing at all times and now I’m back in the movie that I am watching from way up there with all of my favorite souls/stars/people. I have never experienced anything like that before. I came to the meditation to quiet my mind, but was leaving as a freakin’ star? I walked out of the class fighting back tears. I walked up to the meditation teacher who was preparing a cup of tea and said, “Thank you. I just saw my parents.” She asked me to describe what happened, so I did. She got tears in her eyes and said, “How amazing that you got to experience that.” Then she started gabbing with another gal like it was kind of normal. That was it. I was standing there with the most incredible experience I have ever had. I did one last look around the room to see if there was one person who it happened to too, but everyone was carrying on completely normally, no one else was tripping out.
I walked out of the studio wanting to stop every stranger I passed and tell them what the heck just happened. But I didn’t. I actually haven’t told too many people about the experience at all. It was pretty far out. I am not just referring to the limitations of what our human minds can comprehend, but literally it was so far out, galaxies and galaxies away. What I do know is I experienced a peace that I never knew possible and it was amazing; life changing actually.
I was so moved by what I saw and felt that day that I got a star tattooed on the inside of my wrist. It’s extremely comforting when things get rough, I get caught up in the silly fleeting moments of stress or upset about something that really doesn’t matter in the big scheme of things and I glance down and am reminded that I am a star.
I paid a visit to the University of Santa Monica not too long after and had a chance to sit with the head of school, Ron Hulnick. I brought up my meditation experience and he said, “You time traveled. I’ve known others who have done that as well.” He said it so matter of fact it was like he was saying, “I have other friends who like pickles too.” I find it interesting that you can speak to one person about an experience like this and it seems nutty, while another responds as if it’s totally normal.
I know that my human brain can’t comprehend the plethora of magnificence that’s “out there” in the universe, but on that day, on that lounge chair covered in a soft blanket, I got a small taste of pure peace, freedom, and star power, and boy I look forward to going back.
I am a star. You are a star. We have the power of 1000 stars. We have star power.
Carl Sagan was an American astronomer, cosmologist, astrophysicist, astrobiologist, author, science popularizer, and science communicator in astronomy and other natural sciences. He said a couple of things I now find every interesting,
“The nitrogen in our DNA, the calcium in our teeth, the iron in our blood, the carbon in our apple pies were made in the interiors of collapsing stars. We are made of star stuff”. Carl Sagan's Cosmos: Then & Now
“We are a way for the cosmos to know itself.” - CARL SAGAN
I know myself. ❤️